Fantasy Football Xmas Finale

 

Wisner Family  December 2024

A Fantastic Fantasy Family and Friends Football Finale Frames 2024.  What better way to keep Sundays full of fun.  No waivers, trades or injuries required - as we are all healthy and continue to be blessed with plenty of game time. 

Jenna, Paul, Teddy and Wes (Defensive Backfield) – Teddy and Wes are no longer rookies and that backed up Jenna and Paul on defense.  Potty spring training was marginally successful which is why they remodeled their room for a new one.  Wes’s MOM cadence created many neutral zone infractions. Jenna’s Sunday cooking has made the NFL Ticket worth the investment. 

Ellen (KIcker) - Kicked up the Corporate Ladder, Ellen now can hold out for the best contract.  Her away game record during road trips for weddings, visits to friends, and ubering Susan to Akron has been unbeatable.  Plus, Pickleball Prowess Puts People in Place.  It was like a kick in the gut when Cleo, the cat, was blocked into a possible loss. Then an overtime miracle allowed Ellen to save the day. 

Susan (Quarterback) – Missing the fifth Chosen pick didn’t stop her in the draft.  Burrowing into first place Susan seems almost guaranteed to win the championship.  Susan doubled down in time and giving across three teams– Crossroads, Emmaus and Bridge.  I’ll ask a question on how to cruise into first place for next Season – maybe with an away opening game in England.

Garen (Offensive Lineman) – Seven decades and still in the game, Garen’s main offense is gaining pounds.  Can it be sitting in the chair is the problem?  His deep dive into spiritual small groups was Supercharged into Seven days in Utopia.  Fostering a new money offensive line will help protect the quarterback from social sacks and maintain security.

Podcast Play by Play – No notebook(LM) required for the Wisner activities this year. Lake Wawasee is now be traditional summer training camp for the entire team.  This year away games included AL, IN, and FL.  The home stadium gained some upgrades in garage parking, lavatories, grounds and main entrance.

Sadly, there were losses this year – too many for the Rufferee to recount.  Yet the good memories of past seasons of play can still revive the joy and new players (CAB) will give us hope. 

Regardless of your ranking this season, fans will return, championships are still a hope, and the real win is about being on a team.  Seasons come and go; the Wisner’s are grateful for another year to play with you in the Superbowl of Life.  

 

                                                

                      Merry Christmas & Happy New Year

                          “The most valuable player is the one who makes the most players valuable”

                                                                                                                                      Paintin’ Manning

                                                                                                                                                    

What Day is it?

No wonder prisoner's and castaways need a system of tracking days.  Even though this is Sunday, the routines are all off.  It will take discipline to keep the daily and weekend schedule.  Today was totally a family day -  working in the yard, flying kites, and watching movies together. 

Such a windy day and and variable enough to challenge the best kite flyers.  Yes - we lost one temporarily - still awaiting gravity.

This evening I decided to line the Badminton court early.  It is always and ordeal to find the holes for the net since I always forget to put the tin can over the top of them each winter.  Now the lockdown at the house will provide extra sports available for family play.  I know the New York Governor recommended no contact sports -  I put badminton in that category :)

It was a great day to put the crisis out of memory -  but what day is it?

  

Stunned Silence Saturday

It felt like a full eclipse - total darkness as Miami University lost to University of Cincinnati for the 12th time in a row. How memories fad so quickly.  The years I attended Miami the football team ran up a string of 23 undefeated games.  Last year Miami had entered the record books as being the only team to go 0 and 6 and win 6 straight games to end the season and get a Bowl Bid.  So naturally, the alumni like me felt the recent losing streak years (21 straight defeats) were behind us. 

But this game - the 5th oldest rivalry in US history - was time to show UC that Miami was back.  Unfortunately, of the 28 years as a season ticket holder this game will be etched into my memory.  The final two minutes will forever be remembered as the worst luck and judgment in my Miami Football memory.

The Victory Bell is once again missing from Miami's campus.  Sounds of Silence!

59-56-7  Miami             

With Jenna (3/8 of a Redhawk and 5/8 BearCat), Paul and Ellen Bearcats, it was a tough evening for Susan and I  (old Redskins).    

Carting Balls

It was a great weekend with R.M. and friends with a road trip to Keeneland.   Plenty of food, drink and fun.  The only challenge was the seven holes of golf in the cold rain on Saturday.  Naturally, I had not played golf in the last two years so my performance was the worst of the four. 

The jabbing and kidding was in full steam from the moment my spiderweb clad golf bag was loaded in the car.   UGH.... said T.F. this is the heaviest golf bag I've ever picked up!  How many $%#$ balls do you have in the bag?  Well with my performance you just never know :)

A quick inventory of the bag after returning was evidence that I was prepared for any course and could maybe store some balls outside of the bag.  Thank goodness for golf carts!

No Joy in Mudville (or Cincy)

It was a uniquely ugly loss for the Cincinnati Bengals to the Pittsburgh Steelers last night in the AFC Wild Card Playoff game.  Ugly-- BEFORE (given the Dec. 13 unsportsmen play between the two teams ), DURING  (the volume and nature of penalties last night), and AFTER (the trash talk of some Bengal players).  Unfortunately the press about two Bengal players will cause a nationwide view that Cincinnati should be named Mudville.

An absolutely great article written by Tom Archdeacon of the Dayton Daily News "Bengals Playoff Skid hits new low" contrasts the bad and the ugly with the good:

"And here’s another indelible late-game image, one that’s a flip side to the thugery and selfishness displayed Burfict and Pacman.

When the game ended Whitworth was one of four Bengals – the others were kicker Mike Nugent receiver Marvin Jones and halfback Rex Burkhead – who sought out Steelers players on the field to congratulate them.

Then the massive Whitworth lowered his 330 pounds onto his knees near the 50-yard line to say a postgame prayer. He soon was joined by Burkhead, fellow Bengals Cedric Peerman and Vinny Rey and Steelers cornerback Ross Cockrell.

As he stood in the locker room later and answered every question put to him, Whitworth was finally asked why he had bothered to go shake hands when so many teammates had headed straight to the dressing room and a couple of them had continued to act badly there.
“I shook hands with them because at the end of the day integrity and character and who you are as a man is more important than who you are as a football player,” he said. “And in the face of a loss you have to man up and walk out there.”

What a testament to character and Christian behavior.  We need more Whitworths in the game to get us out of Mudville.

Football Fall Fun & Facts

Saturday was a gorgeous fall day with the first home game for Miami U (Oxford).  Susan, Ellen, her friend S.T. and I enjoyed lunch at 45 East and walking on campus prior to the game.  S.T.  indicated an interest in Florida Universities for her college selection.  As a loyal M.U. graduate, I told her the favorite trivia response when people assume Miami University is in Florida. 

 

"Miami (of Ohio) was a University before Florida was admitted as a state in the Union!

 

Miami was defeated by U.C.  33 -37 in the final minutes. This is the fifth longest college football rivalry - The Battle for the Bell played since 1888.  Given Miami's recent (and almost a record) history of consecutive losses, the alumni felt the day was not lost - after all the weather was perfect.

 

Today is Octoberfest in Cincinnati and Bengals home game (vs San Diego). What a difference in weather also as the announcers contrasted this game from the historic Freezer Bowl AFC playoff game in 1981. 

 

How fun - Fall,  Football and .... for a statistician full of Facts. 

 

 

Truth or Consequences

I don't typically like to redundantly blog about a recent news article - but I couldn't resist propagating and virally duplicating the points of Michael Ledeen in his May 17th WSJ commentary "Bridge - Not Chess is the Ultimate War Game".  Mom and Dad taught me card sense (although I think card sense is a DNA gene), and the game of Bridge.  The real teacher I had was Rich M. (my college buddy) who was a top ranked chess player also. 

Michael Ledeen's observation about player feints is exactly why I love the game:

"Frequently a player will have to decide whether he would rather tell the truth to his partner (thereby informing his opponents) or deceive the enemy (thus running the risk of seriously fooling his ally across the table).    Nothing like this exists in even the greatest board games. They permit some feints, to be sure, but not outright lies. Great bridge players are great liars—as are brilliant military leaders and diplomats and politicians."

Luckily Rich M. put up with my lies that I claimed were true and legitimate "Goren" methods of playing.  Our friendship was sealed when I declared that our Bridge partnership was officially over in a dispute over an exception to the Blackwood convention after a cue bid of an ace.   Reflecting back - it was my error but Rich was the bigger Bridge partner to apologize. 

Source: http://www.zazzle.com/bridge+game+cards

 

Now S.S. is my regular Bridge partner and he gives me great "Bridge Mercy" also in my lies (or convention ignorance).  When asked by opponents what my bid means he always responds - "I have no clue".   It supports what I have put on my convention card under Special Conventions:  "Don't trust anything this guy says .... he is a Cowboy bidder:  :)  "

A Bridge game is quite a intriguing practice of ethical paradoxes.  Every bid and play of the hand is a choice of Truth or Consequences. 

Deep Conversational Strokes

Conversations strokes (like your tennis strokes) can be short and simple or deep and long.  If you conversation is shallow your relationship with the person you are talking to will likely return shallow or non existent volleys.  The deeper your conversation will create an opportunity for more enriching "conversational play". 

For those people you love the most, practicing deep conversational strokes will provide you a more satisfying and pleasurable conversation.  There are risks in hitting a tennis stroke deep - it could go "out of bounds" or be interpreted as a ball not to be returned.  However, in most cases your conversational player will see the effort you are putting into your stroke and attempt to return it deep also.

Here is a deep volley question:  "What made you feel good about yourself today?"   Notice how it is an open ended question; it is very personal; it is positive; it indicates a sincere desire to learn more about the feelings of others.

I suggest you try some "deep volleys" first with your spouse, parents, brothers and sisters and then "graduate" to best friends (caution is warranted here - be sure you know what a best friend is). 

Remember, hitting it deep means more challenging returns - but a more enriching game.

Credit for this entry idea:   Six Questions that will save your relationships  by MarcandAngel.com
I suggest you watch the video that they put together on their blog site.

Conversational Fun

Why do tennis players play tennis?  Even after you consider the selfish benefits - competitiveness, exercise, self improvement, mental challenge, and winning feels good - the overriding benefit comes from the other player and having fun together.  So it is with conversation.  If you just enter into conversation because "you feel you have to" then you will have started into a game that is NO FUN.  You might as well play alone (which in conversation terms would be talking to yourself).

That is why good conversational flow starts with attitude followed by technique and play.  It is important to think about the benefits you will receive from a good conversation:

(1) Curiosity exercises you mind
(2) Find a lifelong friend or nurture an existing lifelong friendship
(3) Laughter -  one of the keys to joy
(4) Getting Help for a current life issue
(5) Networking - adding to your catalog of future contacts
(6) Diversity -  Broaden your views in life
(7) Connecting -  Helping others by connecting your network together
(8) Smiling -  When you smile you get personal rewards
(9) Strokes -  We all want strokes and affirmation that we are interesting to others
(10)  THE FEELING OF FUN!

The list goes on and on.  Use whatever benefits you see that will allow you to overcome any reticence to entering into conversation.  Think about the past conversations that have benefited you.  Without communication with others you could accomplish nothing.  We live in a world of relationships and every relationship requires communication.  You can think of this in an abundant fashion or scarcity. 

The more conversation you create - the more benefits you get.

Conversational Don'ts

The old adage about never discussing sex, religion and politics is a platinum rule in conversational play.  In tennis equivalency it is like throwing your racket, continuously arguing about a line call, and temper tantrums (unnecessary comments about shots/disrespect). 

Why are these three subjects dangerous?  Each  subject contains strong emotional heritage - strong beliefs involving judgmental values.  Even if you think you have flexible or open beliefs about any of these subjects, the other player may be totally the opposite.  A conversation into any of these areas can easily fall into a trap of debate club and there is zero probability that you can convince someone in a short conversation to change their deeply rooted values and beliefs.

I might even add a fourth subject of danger - money, salary, and material possessions. Money, Sex, and Religion are the three major causes of divorce - another key indicator of conversational radioactive zones. 

So even if you know someone as well as your spouse these subjects are volatile areas of risk and better left out of casual conversational settings.

Three/Four Word Conversational Volley

I introduced the most effective stroke in conversational tennis - the immediate volley.  I discovered this stroke during my training at Accenture.  Initially it was when I took a course on Socratic Selling Skills and learned the most important three words to get people to talk - "Tell me more".  Later during Accenture's training for recruiters in the CBI (Critical Behavior Interviewing) methodology of interviewing, I added many more three to four word immediate volleys:

(1) Tell me more.
(2) What did you do?
(3) How did you feel?
(4) What did you say?
(5) Take me there -
(6) How did you act?
(7) Where did you go?
(8) What was said?
(9) What was the result?
(10) What did you want?
(11) Describe it to me.
(12) Explain it to me.

You can easily design you own volley stroke - just remember keep it to 3-4 words that ask very personal details about the situation the person is describing.  Notice the word YOU and ME.  They are instrumental in constructing the volley.

When you get good the immediate volley, you will find plenty of time to prepare longer and smoother stroke in the conversational play.

Conversational Inventory

It's important to have a complete inventory of available conversational subjects (strokes) that have worked in past volleys.  As you build an inventory, you will be able to rely on these proven subjects in confidence.  I suggest you avoid the common (and boring) stuff - weather, weekend plans, where you live, schooling etc.  Instead think of some subjects that you would find interesting.

Tell me about any home projects you planning or doing now.
What are your family traditions at ....  Christmas, Easter, Fourth of July etc.
What are your favorite restaurants around town... Why
Books, Movies, TV Series, Songs  are good ways to learn about someone.
Asking about preferences and understanding their thinking can be enlightening.
What's your favorite technology gadget and how did you discover it.

You will find some of your strokes will come back quickly and require fast exchanges back and forth.  Other subjects will be "deep" and give you plenty of time to plan a response.  Picking the right stroke for the other player is a skill you will develop based on  your inventory of subjects and the talent of the other player.

Instead of just creating a sigh of relief when the conversation volley is done, look back on the game and analyze what worked and what didn't work.  This conversational analysis will add to your skill in future play.

Conversational Clues

Like the game of tennis, as your conversational game progresses, you can increase the effectiveness of your game with strategy.  Knowing the style and stroke of the other player can help you modify your approach and style during play.  The key is understanding the conversational clues the other player gives you during play.

When someone asks you about a subject you have been given a great clue. Once you describe, explain or answer their inquiry you can easily ask them the SAME question back. You will be amazed at how the person's question reveals something that they really wanted to talk about and suddenly they control (even dominate) the conversation (taking the pressure off you to talk).

 Here's an example:

Other Player:  " Have you been on vacation this summer?"    
{Notice that the person asking this question isn't trained on open ended questions since this question could be answered with a Yes or No response}

You:  "Yes, I just went to Yellowstone Park"                  
{Oops - a one sentence response - You're not being very helpful in conversational flow}

Other Player : "Wow - I've never been to Yellowstone Park did you like it?"                                                
{Ouch!!! another YES/NO question - he needs to review OPEN ENDED QUESTIONS}
  
You:   "Yes, I did ....                                                               
{OK - I'll help him out
You again: .... I really like taking vacations that involve nature".
{you take control of the conversation  and even offered up a clue for an new subject -  about nature}
       
Long........awkward ......silence
{This person wasn't prepared for a new subject and can't respond.  He is struggling. How could you help out ?}

You again trying: "How about you, what things did you do this summer?"
{Wow - you just asked him what he asked you first (the same question) - but you did it correctly with an OPEN ENDED QUESTION"}

 Other Player:  "Well, I went to Europe and had a great time.  We saw .......
{BINGO --- Now the person talks for the next 10 minutes continuously about their vacation to Europe. With just nods and "tell me more" you keep the conversational ball in play!}

This example shows that the volleys were in deep trouble (by both players) as they attempted to find their tennis style and rhythm of the conversation.  It was the clue about the other player wanting to tell you about their vacation that created the successful conversational flow - and your ability to ask the Open Ended Question -  What did you do .........?

Like tennis - keep practicing!  Use conversational clues to improve your game.

Conversational Doubles

Sometimes you are not just playing singles in conversation.  Group conversational dynamics can be challenging to those who prefer to listen while a group is discussing a subject.  However, the best doubles conversation is when everyone is participating in the play. The most important skill in this conversational setting is determining when to play or interrupt the conversation.  This can be very uncomfortable for the passive tennis player - the player who prefers simple volleys.

My hint for group conversational play is to anticipate and raise your voice level.  Aggressive conversationalist will interrupt and use louder voices to take the ball in flight.  Here is where speed is important.  Simple short interjections of discussion will provide adequate participation and let those around you know that you are interested in participating in the discussion. 

Try things like:

(1) That's interesting .....   (if you have time you can add "Tell me more")
(2) That's happened to me before .....
(3) I agree ......
(4) Joe (another player in the conversation), do you think that .......
(5) How about you .... Joe

You can even be the conversational hero and save the extended volley discussion by recognizing the subject is about to be hit into the net - and save it with another round of energy.

If you don't participate in the discussion, you appear bored by the others and soon will be edged out of the attention.  Be a active group player at all times.

Spin the Conversation

Advanced Conversation "401" requires skill and practice.  This is a technique of almost infinite volleying.

Inevitably a subject matter in the conversation begins to wane - "run out of gas".  In tennis the volleys become weaker and harder to hit. If you are unprepared silence hits and both players stand stunned without a clue of where the subject ball has landed.  Without the ball (new subject) there is no chance of play. 

A great conversationalist can anticipate this and spin the subject into a brand new conversational volley.  The key to this technique is careful listening to associated subjects casually refereed to by the other player.  Example:

Suppose you served up the vacation subject: "Where are you going to vacation this summer?"  During the volley of responses the other player mentions the challenges of air travel to Europe.  As the subject begins to fade you might ask:  "What do you do to try to avoid jet lag?" or "What's you favorite and least favorite Airline? (nearly everyone will have a slew of travel stories).

Once you start spinning into new subject manners your conversational partner may start spinning subjects back.  This can be a very enjoyable advanced game. 

Body Language in Play

It's not only your questions or responses that will determine conversational success, it's how you look, move and react to the play that will also assist you in minimizing conversational stress. Like tennis, conversational concentration is critical to keeping the "ball in play". You must listen deliberately and intently in conversational flow - it's not just about preparing you next question or response. Interrupting the other player can also disrupt their stroke and play. It is normal for your mind to wander - the verbal speed of return conversation is a snail's pace compared to the speed of your brain in processing the information. Don't let this mismatch of pace disrupt your nonverbal actions - eye contact and body movements.

Eye contact is critical - focusing on the other player's eyes will tell them you are interested in what they are saying and it will aid in your listening concentration.  Nodding can communicate both interest and encouragement for the speaker to continue on their conversational path.  Even looks of intrigue or puzzlement can create a non-verbal clue to the player that you want more information. 

A smile can do wonders in conversational success.  A smile shows your receptivity for continuing dialogue.  Acknowledgement of wit and humor puts both parties at ease and sets a positive tone for continuity - within the subject discussed and for new topics of potential interest.

Your feelings of comfortable conversation will be contagious to even the most laconic player.  Showing non-verbal openness will also reduce your conversational stress. Remember you are looking into a conversational mirror - if they look stressful then likely you are stressful also.  Take a deep breath, smile, nod approvingly and focus your eyes - watch what happens immediately.

Over thinking is like "over stroking" and will disrupt your flow.  Get your body in control and the flow will come naturally.


  

Return and Volley - Conversation Continuity

In my last blog I mentioned the conversation analogy to tennis and introduced the "first serve" question.  A good conversation though depends on partnership returns and volleys.

While the initial serve is important, it could be the serve went wide and a weak or non existent return came back (e.g. a one sentence response with a long silent pause). Don’t panic but be prepared - a good "first serve" can anticipate a weak return (Remember #3 in the last blog - Pick a subject and question that has natural and easy follow-on questions).

At this point you have two options – let the subject go and re-serve or attempt the volley. My preference (if the ball didn’t go into the net) is to attempt the volley.

There are two types of Volleys:


A. Immediate Volley – no bounce (when you have the least desire to talk):


Immediate Volley - Tell me More

(1) “Tell me more” - Say only those three words and out wait the uncomfortable silence
(2) Why …. Why did you …. Why not.
(3) “That’s interesting how did you decide that”?
(4) “I’m not sure I understand could you explain what you meant about ….
(5) “What was your thinking?
(6) “Who else was with you?



B. Standard Volley – you talk and give the other person time to collect their thoughts. Remember they may be just as stressful as you at conversational play. If the other player is a cooperative conversationalist and the volleys look easy then take your time and help extend the volley with sharing your own information. Reveal some related information about the subject (or yourself) and prepare a methodical smooth follow-on.



Respond and Prepare a Smooth Follow Through

Here are some suggested conversational fillers giving the other player time to think:

(1) “Same with me … I ……
(2) “ I agree … for me it’s like …….
(3) “I had a similar experience when ….
(4) “That’s exactly like the time I …….








Now prepare your stroke and smoothly follow through with another question:

(1) What else do you remember about ……
(2) How did you feel when ……
(3) Was that the first time or has this happened before?
(4) Why did you …..

Notice the follow on question attempts to understand their thinking, feeling, memories, other related experiences. Like a detective you are probing for more information. Done correctly it proves you are listening intently to their response and want to keep the ball in play.

Above all - remember to calmly and methodically enjoy the conversational rhythm of the volley. 

Conversation Serves

Conversations can at times be like the game of tennis –with one exception, the goal is to keep the volley going. A good first serve can be the key to success. Remember you aren't trying for an ace - you want the ball to come back.

What first question will create a sustainable long volley?

The goal of the first question is to find an interesting topic or theme that “keeps the ball in play”.  

Here are some characteristics of a good “first serve”:

(1) Open ended questions – Try to ask questions that DO NOT require one word (Yes/No) or one sentence answers. Start the question with “Tell me …; “Explain …; “How do you….; Why do you .....;
(2) Ask about the person – Usually everyone likes to talk about themselves
(3) Follow-on clarification – Pick a subject that has natural follow-on questions
(4) Keep to non controversial subjects

So here are some sample first serves:
 
Tell me what a typical day for you is.
Could you give me advice on how to ….
What do you like about your job?
If you could live anywhere where would you choose?
What do you do to stay so fit?
Why do you like …….?

Bracket Statistics

This year I will come in dead last (8of 8) in the March Madness family bracket contest.  The official contest run by D'Lane through CBSsports.com website has been recorded since 2008 (I was last in that year also).   I did have a moment of glory in first place in 2010 when I was lucky enough to pick Duke as the Champion.

This year everyone became a statistician when Warren Buffet insured Quicken Loan's Billion Dollar Bracket Challenge.  Everyone that talked about the probabilities cited incorrect statistics - but they had the concept right -  it wasn't going to happen.  The chance of randomly predicting the outcome of the main draw's 63 games is one in 9,223,372,036,854,775,808  (you could round it to 9 quintillion and be close enough).  Now the other variables are that no one picks totally randomly (and rightly so).  Also Warren Buffet limited his risk by insuring only 15 million entries. 

Actually there was one non entry on Yahoo's Bracket site that perfectly picked the first 36 games but was foiled by the Dayton/Syracuse matchup (Dayton upset Syracuse).  But even his bracket must have been picked "from the heart" since he had Michigan and Michigan St. as the final two.

Actually the best part of this years March Madness is that the word Quintillion was actually said more than it has been said in the last "ump-tillion" years combined. 


PS  - Quintillion is any number with 18 zeros behind it  10^18.   And for those mathematicians in the group that is a million times a trillion  (10^6 * 10^12)  =  10^(6+12) = 10^18

Laugh, Think, Cry

Seemingly random connections can connect suddenly in life.  I was coaching Covington Partners in their three minute presentation at SVP Cincinnati Fast Pitch (coming Wednesday night).  I mentioned a presentation I remembered from Jim Valvano at the Cincinnati 100 event (sponsored by Arthur Andersen) back in the 90's.  One of the stories Jim related was about a benched player that given the chance turned a pivotal game to the win column.  The inspirational line was that at the end of the game the benched player related that his father (who was blind) had died the night before and that this would be the first time he would be able to see him play.

 

Amazingly in the Sunday evening fellowship J.B. referenced Jim Valvano also as we discussed how an individual can deal with suffering (Jim Valvano died at age 47 of cancer).  Jim's ESPY speech - "Don't give up .... Don't ever give up" still continues to be an inspiration to many people with cancer. 

In eleven minutes he is able to capture your attention and deliver on his three rules of living life to the fullest:

(1) Laugh - "You should laugh everyday"
(2) Think - "You should spend some time in thought"
(3) "You should have your Emotions moved to tears"